Common Questions About Confidence

Confidence, no confidence, losing confidence, finding confidence,

What is confidence what is it and why is it important?

Confidence is an extraordinary energy in you that is strong, vibrant and engaging. It creates a greater sense of well- being, a sense of peace and opens doors to a world of growth and new experiences.

The why? You acknowledge you are worthwhile and capable, it enables you to deal with challenges in a constructive way, it empowers you to face life head on.

You know it when you see it in someone and you say ‘I want some of what she has got’.

  It is an uninhibited demonstration of your uniqueness that begins with taking the first step

Why is self- talk so important in Confidence?

Because that nagging little inner voice can run riot and stop you in a heartbeat, despite your best intentions. It might say things to you like:

  • You don’t have the guts to step up and find a new life
  • You failed last time why will this be different now
  • You won’t be able to face life alone
  • You are not worthy, who will listen to you

Any or all of these may manifest as procrastination, overwhelm, a dull heavy feeling, a feeling of dread or a gut-wrenching quiver of how will I face the day. Or a vague feeling that is more out there to life…

A key piece of my strategy is working with self- talk and language patterns. Change your language and you change your life.  It is here that the adventure begins.

 'Can anyone learn confidence?

Is this possible? Absolutely!  Confidence is a habit, just like getting dressed every day. Look down for a moment, I bet you didn’t forget to get dressed this morning...did you? You learned as a child to dress yourself and you got proficient at it over time. Confidence is the same. The more you have a go and practice the better you become.

Start from where you are and build on that. There is a myriad of reasons why you are not feeling confident in maturity. It is something that can be fixed.

One of the new tricks you will learn is that your new confidence could be even better than you thought possible.

Where do we get Confidence from? 

  • Genes - for some confidence comes naturally, you inherit it like blonde hair or blue eyes
  • Environment - family, school, friends, sport, community, relationships, social media, your profession
  • Mindset - the choices you make and the way you react to setbacks. My question is ‘Did you remember to dress your mind when you dressed your body this morning’?
  • Actions - daily rituals, strategies to support you and the actions you take on a daily basis

It becomes fascinating research as you begin discover your inner you and it becomes trailblazing information that you can build on.  

'Can you become confident at any age? '

Certainly, you can. Confidence is a habit, just like getting dressed every day. It takes practice just like learning to tie your shoe laces.

The younger you start the better, however my thoughts are… you start with where you are right now and work on it together. There can be a myriad of reasons why you are not feeling confident in maturity.

And in maturity, you have a lifetime of experiences to draw on to help you through this down time. That is a positive!

Being confident in maturity is critical to you getting more of what you want to get out of life.

Absolutely and in a short time you will realise it was well worth your trouble

Is it possible to be ‘confident about not being confident’?

Absolutely, this is a biggie. When you continually say ‘I can’t do… because I am not confident’ it is like a reverse affirmation being drilled into your brain. Negativity starts doing a happy dance, it gets excited and invites every negative in your life in technicolour, in a heartbeat, with full sound effects to support it.

It stops you in your track and, you feel you failed again and being ‘confident about not being confident’ becomes your mantra squashing any move you make to go forward.

Absolutely, it begins with the first step as you step into new territory you find it becomes easy, fun and effortless     

What is a 'Confidence tree'?

It is my visual about recognising and acknowledging the strengths you already have and reassuring you that all is not lost when a challenge robs you temporarily of your confidence.    

You may be going along in life smoothly, feeling very confident when life gives you a shake or a shudder. if feels like the bottom has fallen out of your world and you ask where is my confidence when I need it?

Actually, it is still in there, waiting to surface, it is simply buried under your current life issue.

Picture a bonsai tree with its sturdy branches slightly curved coming from a firm strong trunk. When you are confident you are sitting on top of that tree. When something happens, you fall a few branches.

You feel you have hit the roots and gone underground.

When you have the strategies to access your inner confidence and bring it to work in your current situation then you know the secret of my confidence tree.

Learning about your confidence tree is part of my confidence coaching.

We start from where you are and climb back up that tree.

Meet the challenge and when you reach the top again you may surpass all your expectations. How good would that be? 

In all these scenarios there is an opportunity to dance to different possibilities, through re-booting, refreshing or regaining your Confidence

When you reach out for help, you get to see your challenge through another set of ears, another set of eyes and share another's heart space.

When you are re-inventing yourself you may experience growth at lightning speed, it's natural to feel the struggle. It's normal to feel challenged. It's common that past stuff that is unresolved will come up, and confidence can slip away in the moment.

And if you ALLOW the space rather than resist it you will find that it's in these moments that you can shift and grow to your next version of your confident self.

You already have so much wisdom within you, knowing how to access that and bring it forward into your life today is what I do as a Confidence mentor.

If this speaks to you, if it resonates with you if you are sick of feeling the pain and want to move forward, then I invite you to explore my website and get to know me.


If you decide to work with me, I will take away your overwhelm so you can focus on attracting the next best thing into your life with confidence.

Give yourself the gift of confidence with all the resources you will need, using a simple step by step approach. You have come to the right place for food for your soul.