In case you are wondering… or you are holding your breath…wondering what I am up to…for the first time in 11 years I have put myself in a place where I come first.
I am being unashamedly me, warts and all..quirky and all…beauty and all!
So yes…I have not been active on Facebook, my website or my blog…I have been very quiet. There are times in life when we speak out and times when we are quiet and keep it close to the chest. Keeping it ‘close to the chest’ is how I have played this card.
Does that make me more or less confident? Does that make me chicken? Does that make me vulnerable? Whatever you think … and we all react differently…I am more confident … not the ‘screaming from the rooftops’ type of confidence but the kind that is quiet and growing in substance.
Am I chicken for keeping it ‘quiet’? Now that raises the question of does my writing affect anyone other than me? In speaking out on this matter it does affect someone else. Someone whose feelings I care deeply about.
Am I vulnerable? You betcha!!!!!! Is this the first time I have shown my vulnerability? Nooooooooooooooo, it is not. Has that stopped me before? Nooooooooooooo it hasn’t! Does it get easier? Noooooooooooooooo!
I have shared openly since the beginning of the year when I started blogging about issues that affect mature women and about confidence and sensuality. In particular how that affects me and those I know. I will continue to do so.
Now I am in a position after 11 years on my own of having a beautiful man enter my life. It has also had me thinking that 11 years of often intense self help work has served its purpose.
I believe I have made a difference in the lives of many women and more than few men. My openness, showing my vulnerability, my strengths, sharing my highs and lows…has created a space for others to be open, vulnerable, be strong and share weaknesses with me. What a privilege that has been.
Am I stopping what I do? Noooooooooooooooo! Just slowing down while I work out my next move.
What it has done is raise all the fears I thought I had safely sorted… Am I making the right decision? What if it does not work out? Eeekk what if it does? How will I be in a relationship after being alone for 11 years? Have I become a tad set in my ways …’never’ I say! Yes….give the brain half a chance with a negative thought and it will round up every negative experience you ever had plus all the ones you heard and read about in a millisecond. They become run away thoughts very easily and can affect making decisions.
What I can say is I have done some soul searching, we are both open and communicate very well…it is time for me to take a leap of faith…. my heart is open, I am trusting in myself, the man and our future.
My sharing may help you. Maybe you too are deciding the ‘do I’, ‘don’t I’ of a life changing event.
We can sit forever pontificating, thinking, planning…life is to short. None of us know what is round the corner. Losing my daughter earlier this year got me thinking…take life and live it to the fullest…grab it with both hands and just do it! Be unashamedly you.
Soooo here I go! Checking back into confidence…it is rather like a diamond…it has many facets.
Love to hear from you about how you stepped up, made a decision and took your leap of faith. When you share your stories…it may make an amazing difference for someone else.
Warm regards Di…and what …you are asking… does this woman do?
I am passionate about mature women having the confidence and personal presentation to support their life choices.
If that is not happening for you…let me help you… with one on one coaching, small group activity or workshops…
Would you like to know more? Slip over to https://diriddell.com/confidence-coaching-2/
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